Born again and Bible readings

IN late October last year, I went through an experience that rocked my world, that left me depressed, thinking suicidal and homicidal thoughts and questioning my life and existence. It doesn't matter what the incident was, what matters is that I started a journey of exploration.

I did the usual: I reached out to family and friends who supported me through the worst. I saw professionals including counsellors, doctors and beauty therapists who attended to the physical and emotional symptoms that I was experiencing as a result of the events I'd been through.

I'd gone some way but was stuck and couldn't move on. Christmas and New Year were tough. I had already abandoned much of my busy life - study, extra work, voluntary commitments - through my sheer inability to cope with anything other than going to work and getting by.

I'd been attending a church with my son and had been enjoying the experience. They had good music, a friendly crowd and interesting preachers.

Then on January 31, 2010 I went to church and Sam Haddon, the associate pastor at the Northside Community Church in Crows Nest preached a sermon on forgiveness and my world rocked on its foundations (again) and I started crying, shaking with the tears, with dribble running down my face and my nose going red (I could feel it).

My husband says that it was divine intervention. I don't make such claims, I just know that at that moment as I sat there listening to Sam I broke through a barrier that had been in my heart for a long time.

And so the journey begins . . .

Since then, I've attended a 10 session course called Search for Life , which I found helpful and now that it's finished I've started a Bible reading program through my iPhone and I'm working through the SOAP (scripture, observation, application and prayer) readings listed each week in Northside's newsletter.

A word or thee on Bibles

I have always had the Jerusalem Bible but it's so old (and in the past, so infrequently used) that it's full of dust mites that every time I open it I get an attack of the sneezes. As I was brought up a Catholic, I'd used the Authorised Knox in the past. Faced with a sneeze-causing Bible and the desire to read the Bible daily, I ventured into Borders but didn't care for their offerings at the prices I could afford and ended getting a King James version for $AUD15.95 at the newsagent.

Additionally, I downloaded a free Bible from the iTunes store and it is the American Standard.

People who know about these things tell me the New International version is best. My son says a bad Bible is better than no Bible and on this we agree.

What's next . . .

Armed with my Bibles (print and virtual) and Northside's SOAP readings and YouVersion's Life Journal reading plan I started reading the Bible daily. I don't pretend to be a Bible scholar, I don't pretend that I understand what's going on or that I have any great insight into God's word. What I have is a thirst and I'm going to the well. I pray for faith. I thought I'd share my journey with you and that's what the plan is for the next year.